Slade

Odds and sods about the British rock band Slade

Sunday, July 03, 2005

Who's Crazee Now?

"Who's Crazee Now?" is the title of Noddy Holder's autobiography (Ebury Press, 1999, ISBN-no. 0-09-187503-X). It came out in a second edition in 2000 with an extra chapter. It is this edition of which I have a copy.
To fully cherish this book you have to be a really big Noddy Holder-fan. Not a Slade-fan, but a Noddy Holder-fan. Nod tells thoroughly about his childhood and youth in Walsall and Wolverhampton in the first 2 chapters of the book, about his family, his schooldays and his love for music that led him to become a guitarist with Steve Brett and The Mavericks.
The next 3 chapters take the reader through the days of The 'N Betweens and Ambrose Slade up to the break-through as Slade. Nod offers 4 chapters on the heydays of Slade, but only one chapter on their downfall, comeback and final break-up. The added 11th chapter concerns Nod's life after Slade, mainly his acting in "The Grimleys", his new family and his MBE.
As you can see most of the book is about Slade, so why do I say that you have to be a Noddy Holder-fan and not a Slade-fan to like this book? Well, it's because it is almost unbearable reading. Not that it is badly written or anything, but Nod is so full of himself that you could almost puke. When you read this book you get the impression that Nod and Nod alone was Slade and that the 3 others only went along for the ride. Of course he had one of the greatest rock voices in the world, a voice that made Slade stand out, and of course he wrote most of the lyrics and was a gifted showman, but to claim that he alone made Slade a success is shooting way over the target.
In my opinion there would have been no Slade no matter who of the 4 guys had been missing. They all had functions and talents special to them that made the group unique. Slade without Don's pounding hard drums and Dave's odd costumes and guitar-riffs would not have been Slade. And Slade without Jim's talents as a composer and a musician…well, forget it! Nevertheless Nod persists in his self-glory as Slade's main asset. You even get the impression that it was Nod who actually wrote Slade's music with Jim only quipping in now and then. How conceited can a person become?
Nod is hard on his 3 former colleagues. Well, not so much Don: "I liked Don a lot, but I had never been sure about Dave." (p. 47). Dave and especially Jim have to take a lot of crap in this book. You can't help thinking that Nod is perhaps a little envious of them, of Dave's outrageous way of dressing and of Jim's musical talents. About Dave he says: "He was also mad keen on very high Cuban-heeled boots. Dave had a real hang-up about his height. He was only five foot two. The first time I met him, I couldn't get over how odd he looked when he walked. He sort of tip-toed around in these heels." (p. 48-49), then continues: "The others were never as outrageous as me and Dave (…) Dave was in a league of his own, but I wasn't far behind." Oh, yeah? Don't remember seeing you in a Metal Nun-costume, mate!
Jim gets the real bad-mouthing throughout the book: "Jim was probably the most argumentative. He could also be really insulting, although half the time, he didn't even realise it. His mouth worked faster than his brain." (p. 78). "He always went for the pessimistic point of view. I always went for the happy opposite. Put it this way, Jim's nickname with our road crew was the Midland's Misery." (p. 153). Etc., etc.
The worst is, however, that Nod doesn't give him the credits that he deserves as the composer of Slade's music. It is always: WE composed the music! To give you an example, p. 186: "I always wrote the bulk of lyrics. Sometimes Jim would chip in a few lines to go with a particular verse or chorus that he had come up with." As if Jim just SOMETIMES came up with the melody for a verse or a chorus and Nod did the rest. It's awful!
All over the book is this slanderous, gossiping, condescending and ridiculing tone when it comes to the 3 other Slade-members. It is unpleasant reading. Not even Don is let off: "The whole band was drinking. When we first became successful Don had started having the odd glass of champagne or whatever. He ended up worse than the rest of us." (p. 164).
Nod ends up dismissing the Slade-adventure with this: "On top of everything, Jim was seeing a psychiatrist, Dave became a Jehovah's Witness and Don was drinking heavily." (p. 223). This way he underlines that he - of course - was the only one who could handle success. His own huge consumption of booze he doesn't mention much and his divorce is explained with a vague comment about him not being able to go on holiday with his wife and that was what made the marriage end. The funny thing is, that our boy Nod is a real "kiss & tell"-type or rather "fuck & tell"-type. In elaborate details he tells about all the girls who were dying to shag him and whom he, of course, also shagged, but apparently that had nothing to do with the divorce. The divorce was probably one of the things that led him to "lose his bottle" as Don once put it, Nod thereby refusing to go on stage anymore and in this way being responsible for the slow killing off of Slade.
"Who's Crazee Now?" is an autobiography and as such the author has every right to tint his self-image as rosy as he likes. It is not becoming, though, when it happens on the expenses of others, as is the case with this book. I got outright indignant on behalf of Don, Dave and Jim when reading it. Hopefully I'm touchier than they are! Anyway, after having read the book I find it very hard to sympathise with Nod, although I still think that he was one of the best singers ever in rock history.
The book comes with 16 pages of black and white photos, some good ones of Slade, although they're all well-know press photos. Nothing new.

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